Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I'm sorry..WHAT!!!

The last week would probably win the Bizzaro award for weirdest news to be published in Times of India..
First, there was news about Teri Hatcher dating Ryan Seacrest.....Ryan Seacrest dates women???
then there was the whole thing about getting Femina Miss India contestants to solve Su-doku...
Sure, their solution times were impressive...but all the contestants were butt-ugly
And as if that wasn't enough..p a r i S H I l T o n set to voice a character in the Simpsons...kiss of death for ANYTHING(even the Simpsons) if you ask me..

But that wasn't all..some doofus Indian director wants to cast the hotel heiress as Mother Teresa in his next movie. It seems he was impressed when she turned down Playboy's offer to model on their centrefold....Cause that's EXACTLY what Mother Teresa did in her youth...fend off an agressive Hugh Hefner.."Hughie..i know i want to shed the whole "mother" image...but i don't think this is the right way..."

Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodies

Yeah I know its been a while. But partly thanks to Santosh and partly to rave about Watchmen and rant about One Night @ the Call Centre, my blogger status has been restored…

Getting to the point, Watchmen is simply put, THE BEST graphic novel out there. Written in 1985, a time when the sales of comics in general were particularly low, it was one of the (along with Frank Miller’s Dark Knight Returns and Art Speigelman’s Maus) books that revived a flagging interest in comics…The entire storyline is too vast for me to summarize here. Its set in the backdrop of the Cold War paranoia amok in the United States and particularly in New York. Superheroes have been outlawed according to the Keene Act although there are a select few who operate in the cover of night.. Nuff said…read the book un-missable stuff… Great artwork with subtle clues to the ending adorning almost every page,a fantastic storyline and an ending that’ll leave your brains splattered on the wall. Orgiastic..

But as luck would have it……….

Yours truly was once traveling in a train. I was very bored and didn’t have any one else in the compartment. Suddenly the train stopped at a station and a pretty young girl walked in. Surprisingly she seemed to recognize me. Turns out she read my blog. I asked her what she thought of it and without a hint of hesitation she said she didn’t think too much of it. I was taken aback.

“sure, you’ve seen a couple of movies….but is this really about you??”, she said..

I wasn’t sure of what to reply…

“I’ll tell you a story, but you must promise to make it your next blog post..”

“what if the story isn’t interesting at all…then what?” I protested

“take it or leave it”, she said

Thus I had to post about the extraordinary story of the young girl. I have chosen to write it in first person point of view from the character i most identify with.

Hi, my name is Thirrrumalleshwaram or Mr T for short. I do practically nothing and am wasting away my whole life. Pardon my grammar but I’m not too much of a writer. Meet my friend Happy Singh. He hates American culture and the Australian cricket team. One day he comes upto me and asks me to try out this new book. It was by an Indian “author” named Chetan Bhagat and it was called One Night @ the Call Centre(ON@TCC). He told me it wasn’t a festering heap of garbage like many other people had told… it wasn’t a bathroom read like the critics said and it definitely wasn’t an unbelievable load of bollocks like his previous book. I was very confused. Happy Singh recommending a Chetan Bhagat “book”!!. Nevertheless I decided to try it.

As soon as I reached home I got down to reading the “book”. In about an hour’s time I had finished it. I was speechless. This was undoubtedly the worst book ever. i couldn’t wait for the next day to get my hands on H Singh.

When I confronted him about this bucket of crap, he just smirked and laughed really loudly. I knew I had been had.

Back in the train, I knew this was going to be my next blog post. It made for absolutely stellar and riveting reading. I promised the girl that my next book would indeed be the wonderful story that she had just narrated. It also served the purpose of keeping me awake through the night. As our stations came closer, I asked her who she was…

She smiled and said,”Isn’t it obvious?”

I replied that it wasn’t

She stood up to leave and then with a passing whisper she said,” I am Chethan Bhagat.”

I reeled from the news that Chethan Bhagat was now a woman as the train came to a halt and I heard a porter’s voice…

(all resemblances to persons living or dead are purely co-incidental….except for Bhagat of course)

Did that make any sense to you??

Neither did One Night @ the Call Centre….

Monday, January 09, 2006

PCME (i)


Here’s a photo from the Valedictory Function in Christ…photo was my idea incidentally…
(Notice:- the PINK shirts we were forced to wear…The loser Biology sections had to wear Lavender…so we were slightly better off)

From Left:- Sahil(aka Fat), Sahlabh(aka Julabh), Trevor(aka Mharius), Me(aka THE Champ),
Narendra(aka Nari)and Praveen(aka Champ)

What me, worry?

The usually stable Blogspot finally crashed the other day..i wasn’t able to upload any posts. Actually I was unable to send mail through sites like Yahoo!. Come to think of it, it might not have been a problem with Blogspot.. But my dad insisted that I call up the VSNL guys and find out what was wrong. Here’s how the conversation between me and the Call centre Operartor who I Wanted to Kick(COWK) went.


COWK: (ace student of the Fake Accent University
) good evening sir, My name is (name). How may I help you.?

Me : I’m not able to send mail through some sites like Yahoo!. Is it a problem with the Vsnl…even sites like Blogspot don’t seem to be working.

COWK: Yes sir, I will definitely help you..just a minute sir…

COWK : sir, you’re saying that Outlook Express isn’t working properly right?

Me : No, I’m not able to send mail…through a browser.i use Mozilla Firefox

COWK : so is that the mail client you’re using sir?

ME : (loudly) NO, that’s the browser I use… sites like Yahoo! Don’t seem to be working..i can’t send mail..

COWK : So VSNL webmail isn’t working…I’ll definitely help you out in this regard sir..

Me: ( a TAD pissed) NO, NO…I don’t use Webmail.. My Yahoo! Id isn’t working…and even sites like Blogspot don’t seem to be working..

COWK : Sir, you can just call the Yahoo! Customer service…They’ll be happy to help you…Thank you for calling VSNL Customer Service..Have a great day sir..


And a great friggin day, I did have…stupid ponces..

Monday, January 02, 2006

Truth, Justice and the American Way

i just realised...I'm faster than a speeding bullet..

Your results:
You are Superman
Superman
70%
Robin
68%
Spider-Man
55%
Supergirl
53%
Green Lantern
50%
The Flash
50%
Iron Man
25%
Batman
25%
Wonder Woman
23%
Catwoman
20%
Hulk
20%
You are mild-mannered, good,
strong and you love to help others.
Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Does this make any sense?

KOREA IS ONE WEIRD COUNTRY!!!!

My mom knows a Korean lady. She has a 12 year old daughter(I won’t even begin to describe how long her name is). Now in Korea when you are born you’re considered 1 year old…..and at the end of your first year you’re two…So this girl was born on Dec 27th 1995.. But on 1st Jan 1996 she was 2 years old…Freakin weird ..

And apparently high school onwards all students get a maximum of 4 hours of sleep a day. They spend at an average of 14 hours a day in school, And are flooded with homework and assignments throughout the year. School timings are usually 7 am to 9 pm, which includes compulsory extra coaching and stuff…Then they have to come home and do the projects and assignments…Boy!, Aren’t we a lucky bunch..

Chik Mun Red

So, I haven’t blogged in a while. Mostly due to college. My uneventful college life mainly consists of 3 hours of bus travel and 6 hours of pretending to listen in class. My college is located on the outskirts of B’lore so it takes a while getting there. The campus isn’t remarkable by any stretch of the imagination, while the canteen leaves a lot to be desired(it’s pitiful actually). My class, most of whom are boys, seems generally like a extremely lazy bunch(a good follw up to the slothiness of my previous class). The crowd is strictly ok with lot of Kannada speakin guys. The pissing off thing is that the majority of them have a weird sense of humour…they seem to find anatomical references to every Goddamm word(They have a good time during Mech period with the rods and the shafts and all!). Teaching is quite good but the faculty is quite strict esp for an engg college. All this bring a strong sense of Deja-vu back to my Christ Junior College days.

That’s a synopsis of my college. 4 years and I’ll be outta there. The hectic nature of college life prevents me from doing blogging much.To satisfy the ardent readers of my blog(Yes, all the one people)I’ll try to blog every weekend atleast….unless I have college during the weekend..

It’s happened before…

Stop smiling at my plight

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Summertime

Your everlasting summer
You can see it fading fast
So you grab a piece of something
That you think is gonna last

My extended summer holidays are almost up... Can't tell you how sad i am.. These have undoubtedly been the best holidays ever..Have done pretty much everythin..from readin books, seein movies, going on treks to even workin and making guest apperances on the telly. Yup it s been a fun 5 months .. Now have to get back to the mundane drudgery of college for the next 4 years..after which i'll be expected to get a life, work and grow fat and bald... That was my bleak view perspective kicking in...
College also might be fun and heck it can't be as bad as my 2 years in Christ College ...can it??
Also this invariably means less movies, books and blogging

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

For those about to rock...


I must admit i'm a huge classic rock fan.. I'm also very condescending of other people's music choices especially when it's somethin like pop or nu-metal. They're usually met with a Tchah! Backstreet Boys or a What Ho! Linkin Park. So what do you get when you mix a deliriously funny guy and some good ol classic rock?...The anti-climatic answer would be the funny-as-hell movie School of Rock(other answers to this question will not be reaponded to kindly)..
To really really sumarize the plot.. Jack Black teaches some kids to play rock music...Black is one comedian who i would definately want to see more of(which is more than what i can say about Ben Stiller).. His hysterical antics really make this film worth a watch...He's ably supported by the child actors..(they actually trained to play the instruments , their acting came later)...This film is really worth a watch.

The movie includes music from Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, Jimi Hendrix, Cream, Deep Purple and a whole lotta others.

The rock band Led Zeppelin are notoriously hesitant to allow their music to be licensed for commercial purposes. Knowing this, Richard Linklater filmed a plea by actor Jack Black in front of 1,000 screaming fans, imploring the band to let the production use the "Immigrant Song" in the movie. The plea worked and the filmed request is included on the DVD.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Bleech.!

Please welcome Harish to Blogspot...Click here to visit his excuse for a blog.. AT YOUR OWN RISK.... You have been warned...
Visit the blog to find out why i haven't been blogging of late ..